Parenting 411: Tips and Ideas for dealing with your Picky Eater

By Claudia Boozer-Blasco

Q. Thanksgiving and other holiday dinners are coming up, and I wish my four year old would be willing to eat the traditional foods that will be prepared. I worry that she’s still a picky eater and hasn’t been willing to try much beyond macaroni and cheese, cereal, bread and apples. Do you have any tips for what I can do?

A. For most preschoolers, picky eating is temporary and will usually end by the time they are school-aged. Young children often want to explore food rather than eat it. It’s another step in growing up and becoming independent. Here are a few common picky-eating behaviors:

• Children may refuse a food based on a certain color or texture. For example, he or she may refuse foods that are red or green, contain seeds, or are squishy.
• Children may be unwilling to try new foods, especially fruits and vegetables. It is normal for your preschooler to prefer familiar foods and be afraid to try new things.
• Children may only eat a certain type of food. Your child may choose one or two foods he or she likes and refuse to eat anything else.

So, what’s a parent to do? As long as your daughter is healthy with normal height and weight, try to relax and not make too big a deal of it. The more you worry and scold, the bigger a power struggle food can become. Set a good example yourself by enjoying a variety of foods including fruits, vegetables and whole grains. Even though your daughter may not show it now, she is noticing your attitudes and observing your good eating habits. Hopefully, she will start to exhibit more of these as she gets older. Here are a few more tips and ideas you can try during this holiday season.

• Get your child’s help selecting and making holiday foods. Get their help at the market picking fruits for the holiday salad. Let them help wash the potatoes, mash the winter squash, or stir the muffin or bread mixes. Maybe also get their help setting the holiday table.
• Offer choices. Rather than asking “Do you want mashed potatoes?”, ask “Which would you like, mashed potatoes or the winter squash?” Encourage your child to sample the various foods, but don’t force them.
• Have a few of their favorite foods available. Encourage them to try at least one new food, but don’t worry if they refuse. Teach your child how to refuse politely.
• Serve small portions. Offer your child a smaller plate. Encourage them to select or scoop small amounts of food, saying they can get more if they still feel hungry. They’ll learn new skills and feel “grown up”. Don’t force them to eat all the food on their plate, but rather let their internal feeling of fullness be their guide.
• Try to make the holiday meals stress-free and enjoyable. Focus on the enjoyment of conversation and being together with family and friends. Let your child see you and everyone enjoying the appearance, smells and tastes of the various holiday foods.
• Check out additional information. The U.S. Department of Agriculture website, www.mypyramid.gov has additional information on helping your children develop healthy eating habits.

Claudia Boozer-Blasco is an Extension Educator in Family and Consumer Resources with the University of New Hampshire Cooperative Extension in Rockingham County. This article appeared in the November, 2009 issue of Parenting New Hampshire Magazine.