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Experts Weigh In on Ways to Ease the Worry
By ADRIENNE MAND LEWIN
Jan. 30, 2006 The families of ABC News' co-anchor Bob Woodruff and cameraman Doug Vogt are coping with a trauma that's all too familiar to those with loved ones serving in Iraq.
Woodruff, who has four school-aged children with his wife, Lee, and Vogt, who has three young daughters with his wife, Vivian, were seriously injured Sunday by an improvised explosive device while traveling with a convoy near Taji, Iraq. An Iraqi soldier also was injured in the blast.
As of Jan. 21, 9,282 of 16,548 injuries of military personnel were caused by IEDs, according to the Department of Defense, and at least 894 of the 2,242 deaths in Iraq have been from IEDs. In the last week, there were 221 IEDs reported, according to security personnel.
For the children of service members, receiving news of a parent's injury is a jarring experience, but experts tell ABC News there are ways to help them understand what is happening with less fear and stress.
As of Jan. 21, 9,282 of 16,548 injuries of military personnel were caused by IEDs, according to the Department of Defense, and at least 894 of the 2,242 deaths in Iraq have been from IEDs. In the last week, there were 221 IEDs reported, according to security personnel.
For the children of service members, receiving news of a parent's injury is a jarring experience, but experts tell ABC News there are ways to help them understand what is happening with less fear and stress.
Answering Tough Questions
"Any time where you have to deal with something difficult for yourself & then how do I explain it to my children becomes a parent's worst nightmare & because [they think,] 'I'm not even sure how I wrap my head around it,'" said Robin Gurwitch, a psychologist who is a member of the American Psychological Association's Disaster Response Network.
"When something has happened, children are going to look to their parents about what should I do," she said. "So if their parents are extremely upset, then I will probably be extremely upset. That doesn't mean if something happens moms and dads should pretend that everything is OK."
Gurwitch said it was important for parents to already have a rapport with their children about their loved one's participation in the war so they know that they can ask questions. "Say: 'Your dad or your mom has been working really hard to stay safe,'" she said. "They are very well-trained and & they have their buddies there to take care of them and good doctors there to take care of them.'"
When someone is injured, the most important thing is to be truthful with children, said Robert R. Butterworth, a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in trauma.
"You can't say things are all right when they're not because you can't hide that fact," he said. "Parents try, but kids pick up the emotions."
Kids will have different reactions upon hearing the news. "The older kids will get upset why are they there and all that," Butterworth said. "Little kids want to know what's going to happen. Are they going to die? Try to say something like, 'The doctors are working on it.' But hiding is not a good idea. Telling older children and not telling younger children is not a good idea. The details are depending on age."
It is also critical to help allay children's stress and worry about the situation, said Judith A. Myers-Walls, associate professor of child development and family studies at Purdue University.
"The most important things to tell the child are that the child is safe and that people are working to help the injured family member," Myers-Walls said, adding, "This may be a new situation for a child, and he or she may not know what is appropriate to do when expressing anger, sadness and frustration. Adults can model their own responses, and they can talk with the child about what might be helpful or appropriate."
Beth Ann Brooks, a professor working in child and adolescent psychiatry at Wayne State University in Michigan, said that all children needed information, though younger ones should receive more brief and less-detailed explanations.
"No matter the age," Brooks said, "the more serious the injured's condition, there should be care taken to ease into the subject gradually with a lead-in like: 'Remember when Mr. Smith, our neighbor, was in that car accident last year and was in the hospital? Well, today we learned that. & '"
Butterworth and other experts said explaining as much as possible about what was definitely known was important so that kids know exactly what the injury means, as well as where the patient is being treated. "When you don't explain, kids can fantasize a more frightening scenario," he said.
Dealing With Changes
There are also things parents and other adults should never do when discussing the injured family member. They should never promise that the loved one will get well and come home because sometimes they don't, said Gregory K. Fritz, a professor of psychiatry at Brown University School of Medicine. But he also said parents should never lie or take away all hope.
Butterworth noted that older children might have strong reactions about the reason for the war or why their loved one was there in the first place, sparking a political discussion.
"It's important that you don't debate the war," Butterworth said. "If they have feelings, just let them have feelings. Family members may have different feelings about it. Get the anger out about their fear."
Gurwitch said going to school and staying in a routine could help. Adults also should talk to children about what kids at school are saying about the news so they can correct any misinformation.
Children may have a series of reactions to the event, she said, including nightmares, trouble falling asleep, and a harder time concentrating. "Extra patience, extra care are going to be so critical at this time," she said. "Recognize that their behavior may be more disruptive."
Children also may have the idea there's something they "could've or should've done" to protect their loved one, she said, and adults should make sure that kids can share those feelings and allay those fears and concerns.
The experts suggested that even very young children make a card or video or a collage of pictures for the patient so that they feel like they are doing something to help.
They also should be reassured that when their parent comes home even if they look different they still are the same parent who loves them, said David C. Schwebel, associate professor of psychology at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.
"The most important information to be relayed," he said, "is that the loved one is doing everything they can to return home quickly, that the doctors are very good and are taking care of the loved one as best they can, that [assuming it is true] you will see your daddy/mommy/whoever very soon, and that he/she will still love you just like he/she always did, even if his/her legs are missing or he/she uses a wheelchair or crutches."
National 4-H Council is trying to collect all the information related to 4-H'ers throughout the country that have supported Katrina recovery efforts. Please share the following link with your 4-H'ers. This link will also be added to the link section in the 4-H Youth site of our web page.
4-H Hurricane Relief: Share Your Efforts and Make an Impact!
Across the nation, the 4-H movement has come together like never before to provide relief and support to states which were devastated by hurricanes Katrina, Rita and Wilma. Countless dollars, hours, and resources of all shapes and sizes have been contributed by 4-Hers, their parents, volunteers, and staff. Not only have these efforts touched so many lives, but they are the untold story of how 4-H continues to live up to the H�s of Head, Heart, Hand and Health!
Help us tell your story! An online survey is available on 4-HUSA.org to capture and catalog hurricane relief efforts of those in the 4-H program. Please visit http://www.4husa.org/HurricaneStory/ to complete the survey and share your story of how you have participated in hurricane relief efforts. Any and all relief efforts can be included - whether you made a personal donation, worked with your 4-H club to collect items for those in need or participated in a special project of support. Please take a few minutes to complete the survey AND be sure to share this announcement with your colleagues and friends in 4-H!
The announcement about the new study described below was posted on the Promising Practices in Afterschool listserv. I thought many of you might be interested in the results of this study. It is available at the web address listed below.
PPAS members might be interested in our new study of after-school program participation and child obesity published in the journal Applied Developmental Science.
Abstract
This longitudinal study assessed the role of after-school program (ASP) participation in the development of child obesity and peer acceptance in a sample of 439 children. Most participants lived in poverty and were Hispanic or African American. Measurements of height and weight determined obesity status and peer acceptance was assessed through teacher- and peer-responses to written surveys. Rates of obesity were 22% at baseline (M age = 4.9) and 29% at follow-up (M age = 8.1). Peer acceptance was significantly lower for obese children than nonobese children. Children who became involved in ASPs were significantly less likely to be obese at follow-up than nonparticipants. Both obese and nonobese ASP participants showed significant increases in peer acceptance over time.
The full article can be downloaded from my lab page: http://pantheon.yale.edu/~jlm79/
Joseph L. Mahoney, Ph.D.
Department of Psychology
Yale University
PO Box 208205
New Haven, CT 06520
Please inform your interested volunteers that the first meeting regarding 2008 NERLF will be held on Saturday Feb 18 at the Merrimack County Office from 10 AM -2 PM.
Some questions you might need to answer for your volunteers:
What kind of commitment is it? - at this point there is no commitment. This initial meeting is just to explore ideas about: what might we want the conference to look like?; what kind of committees do we need?; possible locations; timeline, etc.
Why are we starting so soon? One reason is that we will need to promote this at the 2006 NERLF in New Jersey because the 2007 Conference will be subject matter focused. It is also not too early to reserve a facility for a group as large as ours.
The State 4-H Office will be inviting volunteers who have attended Northeast Leader Forums in previous years. We will also be asking them to fill out a questionnaire so they may provide some input even if they are unable to attend.
Please encourage your volunteers to attend, even if they have limited time to commit. The larger and more varied the group is, the better our conference will be.
Please send name, address, email address and phone # of interested parties to Michele King. Also include a cell phone # so we may contact folks in case of a meeting cancelled due to inclement weather. Thanks in advance for your help. Michele
State and National 4-H Achievement Award judging took place on January 14. The day was a great success with positive feedback from all who participated. This year we had 28 resumes from 6 counties with most youth applying for multiple awards. Four youth applied to attend National Dairy Conference; 14 applied for National 4-H Conference; 18 applied for National 4-H Congress; and two applied for a State Achivement Award only.
The award recipeients are as follows:
National Dairy Conference Jessica Chickering, Cheshire; Rowen Goss, Grafton; Emily Malnati, Cheshire; Abby Patch, Grafton.
National 4-H Conference - Tomas Bowling, Rockingham; Rebecca Vogel, Cheshire; and Katelyn Wuebbolt, Hillsborough. Alternates (in order); Jacob Burgess, Grafton; Jay Rice, Rockingham; Amanda Shultz, Rockingham.
National 4-H Congress - Lindsay Bigelow, Grafton; Tomas Bowling, Rockingham; Rachel Henderson, Hillsborough; Holly Weeks, Rockingham; and Katelyn Wuebbolt, Hillsborough. Alternates (in order); Cori Magnusson, Rockingham; Amanda Shultz, Rockingham; Rebecca Hines, Hillsborough; Jennie Fogg, Belknap; Martha Robie, Grafton.
State Achievement Awards - All National Award Winners and alternates will receive a State Achivement Award as well as; Lester Barthelemy, Rockingham; Valerie Caswell, Rockingham; Emily Chase, Belknap; Christopher Humber, Hillsborough; Emilea Raymond, Hillsborough; Linda Verville, Hillsborough.
The judges decided that Andrew Davis and Alison Fortin needed to built their resumes a bit more before receiving State Achievement Awards.
Thank you to all the counties for your support of the awards process!
Have you subscibed to the 4-H Afterschool e-Newsletter? If not, you may want to visit http://4hblogs.org/afterschool/ and fill in the fields under �Subscribe.� You must subscribe to receive this monthly electronic newsletter. It includes: Success stories! Promising Practices! Descriptions of outstanding after-school providers! And lots of opportunity to send in your own success stories. Here's your chance to keep up with what's happening across the nation.
Explore It After School! Technology and Science for Students with Visual Impairments is a new science, technology, and career exploration resource guide, complete with lesson plans. This resource is designed to broaden academic and career options in fields where girls have been underrepresented. The curriculum encourages girls in science and technology through after-school and summer programs, and is adapted for the visually impaired. The program is multi-faceted, introducing challenging and rewarding activities that encourage independence and challenge stereotypes regarding academic and career options for persons with visual impairments. Sample projects include building telephones, creating websites, dissecting squid, and learning about solar technology.
This resource is available online through Techbridge, a non-profit in Oakland, California, launched in 2000 by Chabot Space & Science Center and the California School for the Blind. Generous support from the Mitsubishi Electric America Foundation and the Gordon & Betty Moore Foundation supported the development of this resource.
This information provided by Jennifer Wei, Techbridge Business Development, Chabot Space & Science Center, and Trudy Dunham, Program Director, CYFERnet / goCyberCamp at University of Minnesota Extension Service. To access this resource, go to http://techbridgegirls.org/ExploreIt.html.
According to a new report from the Economic Policy Institute, the disparity across family incomes in New Hampshire has increased over the past twenty years.
In 1980, the average income of New Hampshire's richest 20% of families was 4.6 times as large as the poorest 20% of families, and 2.0 times as large as the middle 20% of families. In the early 2000s, average incomes of the richest increased to 6.0 times as large as the poorest, and 2.4 times as large as those families in the midde.
Average New Hampshire family incomes over this twenty year span increased by $61,176 for the richest 20%, by $20,113 for the middle 20%, and by $6,382 for the poorest 20%. The study cites the average NH family incomes in the early 2000s at $137,905 for the richest 20%, $58,367 for the middle 20%, and $23,128 for the poorest 20%.
Source: Economic Policy Institute/Center on Budget and Policy Priorities, Pulling Apart: A State-by-State Analysis of Income Trends, January 2006. http://www.cbpp.org and http://www.epi.org
Think Summer!! The brochure and registration form for the UNH 4-H Camps are posted on the website at extension.unh.edu/4H/4HCamps.htm
For anyone who prefers a preprinted brochure, contact the Camps Office @ (603) 862-2184.