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UNH Cooperative Extension provides research and evidence-based family life education and support to families throughout the State of New Hampshire. Our county and state based parenting and family expert team members provide direct educational programming as well as support to other programs and agencies who are working to make New Hampshire a great environment for families.

This Month's Feature Article

The Challenge of Parenting Today

by Karen Blass

Parents don’t have it easy these days. The current challenges facing parents in our society have not only multiplied,  but have become increasingly more complex and often beyond the realm of parents’ ability to comprehend.  Some would say parents are at the mercy of a “socially toxic environment.” James Garbarino  identified  this term about twenty years ago.  He used this concept  to describe a troubling  observation; that the  “social world of children, the social context in which they grow up, has become poisonous to their development.” Most parenting experts would agree, it has only become  more so.

Dr. Wally Goddard, as part of a national CYFAR conference (Children Youth and Families at Risk), identified two significant elements of this toxic environment today:  the rise in bullying, especially cyberbullying, and the increase of unhealthy messages in popular media targeted to our youth. Parents are struggling to counteract these influences, as well as many others, on their child’s development. However, they find their supports are dwindling and their stress increasing.  They want to know how best to help their children develop the resiliency necessary for healthy development in today’s times.

Understanding Gender Differences: Strategies to Support Girls and Boys
One of the publications I have recommended to parents for many years was written by Aileen Fortune, an Extension colleague at the University of Maine. Through the lens of gender differences, it helps parents understand the fundamental aspects of what children require to grow up whole, with all of the skills required to be healthy adults. “Both girls and boys need a full repertoire of skills to develop a strong identity, to be able to achieve fully in the world, and to develop and maintain healthy relationships.”  This publication helps parents, teachers, coaches, family and friends understand how the societal messages about gender can create this socially toxic environment leading to problems such as “bullying and violence in schools, decrease in school achievement, negative body image, eating disorders, dangerous risk taking, sexualized violence and more.”  The information provided by this extensive examination of the influence of gender messages,  will not only be useful to parents, but also to schools and communities interested in creating safe and empowering environments for our youth.

And guess what, the experts are still trying to figure out at what age parenting responsibilities actually end.

Karen M. Blass is an Extension Educator in Family and Consumers Resources with UNH Cooperative Extension in Rockingham County. For more information contact karen.blass@unh.edu or call 1-800-248-6672.